Written at some point before dawn that morning:
Osama Bin Laden is Dead. Teenagers Get Drunk and Yell Things.
I was watching Dumb and Dumber in bed last night (Big Gulps, huh?) when I started hearing that some dude was dead. Turns out it was Bin Laden. This is of particular significance to me since I have been using him as a scapegoat for anything bad that has happened in my life for the past decade (Failed AP History? Friggin’ Bin Laden…).
Realizing that I live six miles from downtown DC and that I was wearing pants (a rarity, especially on the weekend, especially at that hour), I hopped into the Buick and headed down to the White House while listening to BBC Radio’s coverage. They said a bunch of people were congregating downtown and rallying.
They were right.
Lots of young, white kids chanting variations of “USA! USA!” and “Show us your tits!” Lots of homemade signs. Lots of smashed beer bottles and discarded aluminum cans. Lots of facepaint. I saw one guy running around with an iPad using it take photos. People were driving down 15th Street NW honking horns, hanging out of windows and sunroofs, screaming, shirtless. I only counted one crowd surfer, which is one more than I saw either of the last two times I went to a Pearl Jam concert. Apparently the spirit of 90s rock lives on, and it is patriotic as all get out.
Here is a bit of what I encountered.